Birth Control 101 (With a Sprinkling of Politics)

As promised, this is my birth control 101 post. The types of birth control I will be covering in this post are: condoms, cervical caps, diaphragms, the pill, the patch, the shot, Nuvarings, IUDs, the implant and emergency contraception. With each type of birth control, I want to answer the following questions: What is it? How does it work? How effective is it? What are the pros and cons of using the birth control? Does it protect against STIs? Where can one find it? How much does it cost? And finally, since it is election season, I will also discuss how our potential 2012 presidential candidates feel about birth control.

Note: Similar to my other 101 posts (HIV 101 and Safer sex 101), I will cite my sources at the end of the post.

The Main Types of Birth Control

Condom

What is it?

There are two types of condoms: the male (external) condom and the female (internal) condom. Both condoms can be made from latex or polyurethane (if someone has a latex allergy). External condoms cover the outside of the penis and internal condoms are placed inside the vagina or anus.

How does it work?

Both types of condoms block pre-cum and semen from entering the uterus and potentially fertilizing an egg.

Effectiveness?

The external condom is 85-98% effective and the internal condom is 79-95% effective. The effectiveness (i.e. the ability of the birth control to prevent pregnancy) depends on how frequently they are being used and whether or not they are being used correctly.

Pros?

Both condoms are relatively cheap and easy to find (the external condoms more so than the internal condoms).

There’s no need for a prescription from a doctor.

Condoms can be used with other forms of birth control for extra insurance against pregnancy and for protection against STIs.

Cons?

Most condoms are made out of latex, which can be a problem for people who are allergic. However, polyurethane condoms are available in those cases.

Does it protect against STIs?

Yes. Using a condom consistently and correctly reduces the chances of contracting an STI.

Where can one find it?

Condoms can be found in pharmacies, doctor’s offices, health centers, schools, clinics and online.

Cost?

Packs of condoms can cost from $2 to $25, depending on the amount of condoms in the pack. Many health centers, clinics and schools give out condoms for free.

Cervical Cap

What is it?

The cervical cap is a silicone cup placed over the cervix.

How does it work?

The cervical cap is used to stop sperm from fertilizing the egg by blocking the sperm from entering the uterus. Spermicide is used along with the cervical cap to stop the sperm’s movements.

Effectiveness?

The cervical cap is about 71-86% effective. Ensuring the cervical cap is positioned correctly on the cervix and using spermicide increases the effectiveness of the cervical cap.

Pros?

The cap can be used by individuals who cannot take hormones, like estrogen.

It can be put into place hours before one has sex.

It can be used while breastfeeding.

Cons?

It cannot be used during one’s period.

It may be difficult for some individuals to position the cap over the cervix.

It can be moved around during sexual intercourse.

It may be uncomfortable for some people.

One can have an allergic reaction to the spermicide.

Does it protect against STIs?

No, the cervical cap does not protect against STIs. One could use an external condom in conjunction with a cervical cap to protect against STIs.

Where can one find it?

Only health care providers can distribute cervical caps.

Cost?

Cervical caps range from $60 to $75 and spermicide costs about $8 to $17.

Diaphragm

What is it?

A diaphragm is silicone cup with a flexible rim that is placed over the cervix. It is similar to the cervical cap in function, but the diaphragm is larger and covers a wider area.

How does it work?

The diaphragm blocks sperm from entering the uterus and spermicide is used to stop the sperm’s movements.

Effectiveness?

The diaphragm is 84–94% effective. The effectiveness of the diaphragm is influenced by proper placement of the diaphragm over the cervix and the use of spermicide.

Pros?

Similar to the cap, the diaphragm does not use hormones.

The diaphragm can be put into position hours before sexual intercourse.

It can be used while breastfeeding.

Cons?

It may be difficult for some women to place the diaphragm over the cervix.

It may be moved around during sex.

It may be uncomfortable for some individuals.

One may have an allergic reaction to the spermicide.

Some individuals may develop urinary tract infections due to using the diaphragm.

Does it protect against STIs?

No, the diaphragm does not protect against STIs. Using an external condom in conjunction with a diaphragm can provide protection against STIs.

Where can one find it?

Only health care providers can distribute diaphragms.

Cost?

Diaphragms range from $15 to $75 and the price of spermicide ranges from $8 to $17.

The Pill

What is it?

The birth control pill is an oral contraceptive that is taken every day to prevent pregnancy. There are two types of pills: combination pills, which contain the hormones estrogen and progestin, and progestin-only pills. The combination pills are the most common type.

How does it work?

The hormones in the pill do three things in order to prevent pregnancy:

• They prevent ovulation (the process in which the ovaries release an egg to be fertilized).
• They thicken the cervical mucus to block the sperm from fertilizing the egg.
• They also thin the lining of the uterus to keep the egg from attaching to the uterine wall.

In a usual package of birth control pills, there are 3 weeks of pills with varying levels of hormones in them. The 4^th week of pills do not have hormones in them at all. It is during this 4^th week that menstruation begins.

Effectiveness?

The birth control pill is 92–99% effective at preventing pregnancy.

Certain medicines/supplements and behaviors may make the pill less effective:

• The antibiotic rifampin
• Certain oral medicines for yeast infections
• Certain HIV medicines
• Certain anti-seizure medicines
• St. John's wort
• Vomiting and diarrhea

Pros?

Combination and progestin-only pills reduce menstrual cramps and lighten period flows.

Some benefits to combination pills include protection against acne, bone thinning and ovarian and endometrial cancers.

Also combination pills can be used to control when and how often an individual has their period.

Cons?

Some common side effects include: breast tenderness, bleeding between periods, nausea and vomiting. These side effects tend to go away after the first few months.

Does it protect against STIs?

No. Birth control pills do not provide protection against STIs. It recommended that one use condoms along with the pill to protect against STIs.

Where can one find it?

Birth control pills can be purchased with a prescription at pharmacies and clinics.

Cost?

The price ranges from $15-$50 a month.

The Patch

What is it?

The birth control patch is a thin, beige, plastic patch that sticks to the skin. A new patch is placed on the skin once a week for three weeks in a row, followed by a patch-free week. On the fourth week, one has their period. The patch can be placed on the stomach, butt, upper torso or upper arm.

The birth control patch is commonly referred to by its brand name: Ortho Evra.

How does it work?

The patch has the same hormones in it as the pill (estrogen and progestin) and works in the same way:

• Prevents ovulation (the process in which the ovaries release an egg to be fertilized).
• Thickens the cervical mucus to block the sperm from fertilizing the egg.
• Thins the lining of the uterus to keep the egg from attaching to the uterine wall.

Effectiveness?

The patch is 92–99% effective. However, it seems to be less effective in individuals who weigh more than 198 pounds. The patch works best when it is constantly in contact with the skin so the correct level of hormones are consistently in the body.

Like the pill, certain medicines and supplements may make the birth control patch less effective, including:

• The antibiotic rifampin
• Certain oral yeast infection medicines
• Certain HIV medicines
• Certain anti-seizure medicines
• St. John's wort

Pros?

It has similar benefits to the pill. It can lighten period blood flows and lessen menstrual cramps. The patch can also protect against acne, bone thinning, ovarian cancers, etc. Also one does not have to remember to take a pill every day.

Cons?

Most common side effects (breast tenderness, bleeding between periods, vomiting and nausea) disappear in a few months.

The skin around the patch may become irritated.

Does it protect against STIs?

No, the patch does not protect against STIs. Condoms can be used along with the patch to protect against STIs.

Where can one find it?

The patch can be purchased at a drugstore or clinic with a prescription.

Cost?

The patch costs about $15-$80 a month.

The Shot

What is it?

The birth control shot is an injection of the hormone progestin (also found in birth control pills and patches). Each shot prevents pregnancy for three months.


The shot is also known by the brand name Depo-Provera, or by the name of the medicine in the shot, DMPA.

How does it work?

The progestin in the shot works by preventing ovulation (when the ovaries release egg to be fertilized).


Progestin also thickens the cervical mucus to block sperm from joining with an egg.


Progestin thins the lining of the uterus keep a fertilized egg from attaching to the uterus.

Effectiveness?

It is 97–99% effective.

Pros?

Prevents pregnancy for 3 months without having to take a pill, put something against the cervix, put on a condom or check on a patch.

The shot does not contain estrogen so individuals who cannot take estrogen can still use the shot.

It can also prevent cancer of the lining of the uterus.

Cons?

Some side effects include: bleeding between periods, irregular periods, no periods at all after year of use, lighter periods or heavier periods. It depends on the individual.

Also long-term use of the shot tends to cause bone thinning. Talk to a health care provider to see if this is a major risk. One could increase their calcium and vitamin D intake as well as exercise to counteract these effects.

One should not use the shot if they:

• Are taking aminoglutethamide to treat Cushing's syndrome
• Are pregnant
• Have breast cancer
• Have had fragility bone fractures

Does it protect against STIs?

No, the shot does not protect against STIs. One should use condoms along with the shot to protect oneself against STIs.

Where can one find it?

A health care provider will administer the shot every 3 months.

Cost?

Each shot costs between $35 and $75, and each visit after the initial exam may cost between $20 and $40.

NuvaRing (The Vaginal Ring)

What is it?

The vaginal ring is a small, flexible ring inserted into the vagina once a month to prevent pregnancy. It is used for three weeks and taken out for the fourth week so menstruation can begin. The vaginal ring is commonly called NuvaRing, its brand name.

The hormones in NuvaRing are the same hormones used in the combination birth control pills and in the patches: estrogen and progestin.

How does it work?

Similar to other hormone-based contraceptives, the hormones prevent ovulation, thicken cervical mucus and thin the lining of the uterus.

Effectiveness?

It is 92–99% effective.

Certain medicines and supplements may make NuvaRing less effective including:

• The antibiotic rifampin
• Certain oral yeast infection medicines
• Certain HIV medicines
• Certain anti-seizure medicines
• St. John's wort

Pros?

The ring has the same benefits as the pill including protection against acne, bone thinning and ovarian and endometrial cancers. The ring, like the pill, can also be used to control when and how often one has their period.

Cons?

Some common side effects of the ring include: bleeding between periods, breast tenderness, nausea and vomiting. Possible long-term side effects are vaginal irritation, increased vaginal discharge and vaginal infection.

Does it protect against STIs?

No, the vaginal ring does not protect against STIs. One can use external condoms along with the vaginal ring to protect against STIs.

Where can one find it?

The vaginal ring can be purchased with a prescription at a pharmacy or clinic.

Cost?

The ring costs about $15–$80 a month. 

IUD

What is it?

IUD stands for "intrauterine device." IUDs are small "T-shaped" devices made of flexible plastic that is inserted into the uterus. There are two brands of IUD available in the US: ParaGard and Mirena.

The ParaGard IUD contains copper and is effective for 12 years.

The Mirena IUD contains progestin and is effective for 5 years.

How does it work?

Both the ParaGard and the Mirena IUDs prevent sperm from fertilizing an egg and alter the lining of the uterus.

The progestin in the Mirena IUD prevents ovulation and thickens the cervical mucus.

Effectiveness?

The IUD is more than 99% effective.

Pros?

The ParaGard IUD does not use hormones. 

The Mirena IUD may reduce period cramps and lighten period flows.

IUDs can be used during breastfeeding.

The IUD is the most inexpensive long-term and reversible form of birth control available.

Cons?

Some side effects include:

• Mild to moderate pain when the IUD is inserted into the uterus
• Cramping or backache for a few days
• Spotting between periods in the first 3–6 months 
• With the Mirena IUD: Irregular periods in the first 3–6 months 
• With the ParaGuard IUD: Heavier periods and worse menstrual cramps

Does it protect against STIs?

No, IUDs do not protect against STIs. One should use a condom for protection against STIs.

Where can one find it?

A health care provider will insert the IUD into the uterus.

Cost?

The cost for the medical exam, the IUD, the insertion of the IUD, and follow-up visits to your health care provider can range from $500 to $1,000. The Mirena IUD tends to be more expensive than the ParaGard IUD.

The Implant

What is it?

Implanon is a thin, flexible plastic implant that is inserted under the skin of the upper arm. It uses the hormone progestin to prevent pregnancy and is effective for up to three years.

How does it work?

Similar to the other hormone-based contraceptives, the Implanon prevents ovulation, thickens the cervical mucus and thins the lining of the uterus.

Effectiveness?

The Implanon is 99% effective.

Certain medicines and supplements may make Implanon less effective including:

• The antibiotic rifampin
• Certain oral yeast infection medicines
• Certain HIV medicines
• Certain anti-seizure medicines
• St. John's wort

Pros?

It can be used while breastfeeding.

It can be used by individuals who cannot take estrogen.

It is a long-lasting form of birth control that is also reversible.

There is no medicine to take every day or patch to keep an eye on.

Cons?

Some common side effects include irregular periods, lighter periods, bleeding between periods and heavier periods.

Does it protect against STIs?

No, Implanon does not protect against STIs. One should use a condom along with Implanon to prevent the contraction of a STI.

Where can one find it?

A health care provider can insert the Implanon.

Cost?

The cost of the exam, Implanon, and insertion ranges from $400–$800. Removing the implant costs between $100 and $300.

Emergency Contraception

What is it?

Emergency contraception is a type of birth control used after an individual has unprotected sex.

There are two kinds of EC:

• The pill, also known as the morning-after pill, Plan B, Next Choice and Ella.
• The ParaGuard (copper) IUD inserted into the uterus.

Both types of EC can be used up to 5 days after the incident of unprotected sex, but is more effective the sooner it is used.

How does it work?

EC is NOT an abortion. One more time: emergency contraception is NOT an abortion. EC will not work if the individual is already pregnant. EC is a last chance emergency option to PREVENT pregnancy. Anyone who calls EC an abortion or says it has abortion-like qualities is either ignorant or lying. Period.

EC uses the hormone progestin (found in birth control pills, patches, IUDs, rings, implants and shots) to prevent ovulation, thicken the cervical mucus and thin the lining of the uterus.

EC should not be used as a regular form of birth control because there are cheaper and more effective methods of birth control. It is so much easier and less stressful to use the other methods before having sex than to take EC after having unprotected sex and risking the chance of missing the 5 day window period.

Effectiveness?

The pill is 89% effective if taken soon after unprotected sex, but the effectiveness decreases over the 5 day period.

The IUD is 99% effective.

Pros?

An individual can keep some EC pills in the medicine cabinet just in case.

Cons?

The IUD EC would require scheduling a doctor’s visit which might be hard to do in 5 days.

Side effects include: nausea, vomiting, breast tenderness, irregular bleeding, dizziness and headaches.

Does it protect against STIs?

No, emergency contraception does not protect against STIs. It is highly recommended that an individual is tested for STIs because they may have been put at risk by the unprotected sex.

Where can one find it?

The pill can be purchased at pharmacies and health centers/clinics without a prescription by individuals who are 17 and older. Individuals younger than 17 need a prescription.

The IUD needs to be inserted by a health care provider.

Cost?

The price of the EC pill ranges from $10 to $70. For individuals who are younger than 17 and need a prescription, the health center visit may cost up to $250.

2012 Potential Presidential Candidates and Birth Control

President Barack Obama

January 2012 – The Obama administration decided to not allow “religiously affiliated employers such as universities and hospitals to deny full birth control coverage to the women they employ”.

December 2011 – Obama administration overruled EC being sold over the counter to women of all ages.

April 2008 – He said that teens should learn about abstinence and contraception in order to reduce unwanted pregnancies and abortions at the Democratic Candidates Compassion Forum at Messiah College in Grantham, Pennsylvania.

May 2006 – He sponsored a bill providing contraceptives for low-income women.

March 2005 – He voted yes to an amendment in the Senate's 2006 Fiscal Year Budget to reduce teen pregnancy and abortions and improve healthcare for women through sex education & contraceptives.

Mitt Romney

January 2012 – He states: “I can't imagine a state banning contraception. I can't imagine the circumstances where a state would want to do so, and if I were a governor of a state or a state legislature, I would totally and completely oppose any effort to ban contraception.”

2005 – As Massachusetts state governor, he vetoes a bill to allow EC to be made available without a prescription. He states: “This bill does not require parental consent for even young teenagers. It disregards not only the seriousness of abortion but the importance of parental involvement.”

2005 – He vetoes a bill requiring hospital ER doctors to offer EC to rape survivors and would make EC available to the survivors without prescription from pharmacies.

Newt Gingrich

December 2011 – Gingrich, like Rick Santorum, Rick Perry, and Ron Paul signed the Personhood USA Pledge in favor of an anti-abortion and contraceptive amendment to the Constitution recognizing embryos as people. 

December 2011 – He states: “Any kind of pre-conception birth control would be legal. But I think post-conception birth control would be a form of abortion” at an Iowa campaign event.

Rick Santorum

January 2012 – He stated that states have the right to ban contraception, but shouldn’t.

October 2011 – About contraception: “It’s not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.” 

September 2006 – He believes that the Plan B pill is dangerous and is like an abortion, stating: “I agree that it is an abortifacient, and that it’s dangerous to give a dose of hormones equivalent to one third of a whole series of birth control pills to someone without any kind of doctor supervision.”

March 2005 – He voted no to an amendment in the Senate's 2006 Fiscal Year Budget to reduce teen pregnancy and abortions and improve healthcare for women through sex education & contraceptives.  

He believes that the right to privacy that set the precedent for Roe v Wade is not constitutional and the states do not have to respect that right: “The idea of the "right to privacy" is that the state doesn't have rights to limit individuals' passions. I disagree with that. There are consequences to letting people live out whatever passions they desire. And we're seeing it in our society.”

Ron Paul

April 2011 – Regarding EC: “My argument is that the abortion problem is more of a social and moral issue than it is a legal one. If we are ever to have fewer abortions, society must change. The law will not accomplish that. However, that does not mean that the states shouldn't be allowed to write laws dealing with abortion. Very early pregnancies and victims of rape can be treated with the day after pill, which is nothing more than using birth control pills in a special manner. These very early pregnancies could never be policed, regardless. Such circumstances would be dealt with by each individual making his or her moral choice.”


January 2011: He co-sponsored the Title X Abortion Provider Prohibition Act, which called for a prohibition in funding centers, like Planned Parenthood.

http://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/UnintendedPregnancy/Contraception.htm

http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control-4211.htm

 http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/08/health/policy/sebelius-overrules-fda-on-freer-sale-of-emergency-contraceptives.html?_r=1

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/20/barack-obama-birth-control_n_1219622.html

http://www.issues2000.org/barack_obama.htm

http://www.issues2000.org/ron_paul.htm

http://www.issues2000.org/Mitt_Romney.htm

http://www.issues2000.org/Rick_Santorum.htm

http://www.issues2000.org/Newt_Gingrich.htm

Safer Sex 101

Since my last post was about STIs, I thought it would be appropriate to write a quick post about safe sex and safer sex. So what do I mean when I use the terms, “safe sex” and “safer sex”? In my opinion, these two phrases gauge the riskiness of specific sexual behavior in regards to the likelihood of whether or not a person can contract an STI from it. Safe sex is an activity that has absolutely no risk of contracting an STI. Safer sex has much less risk than unprotected sex, but risk is still present.

Safe Sex Practices

Masturbation

Masturbation is a wonderful thing, but it’s still a pretty taboo subject. Parents don’t dare to talk about it with their kids and, in general, it has been turned into a joke amongst teenage boys and in comedies. Young women are told they are not supposed to masturbate because it’s weird and gross. And some people are even disturbed with the idea that their significant other masturbates while in a relationship with them. But why does this have to be the case? There are many benefits to masturbation. Through masturbation, an individual can learn about their body and what makes them feel good. Knowing and accepting one’s body is essential to having high self-esteem. Also knowing your body’s likes and dislikes will make interacting with a partner easier and more pleasurable. Plus, there is an air of independence around masturbation. Masturbation says, “I know my body. I’m in control of my body. And I can experience pleasure on my own without the assistance of someone else.” There is something powerful about not needing to rely on someone else for pleasure (maybe that is why young women are told not to masturbate). And, back to my original point, an individual could masturbate all they want and never have to worry about contracting an STI. Partners can also masturbate together in the same room. This is known as mutual masturbation. Through mutual masturbation, partners can learn more about their partners’ bodies and what gives them pleasure. Because the partners are not touching, there is no possibility of an STI being transmitted.

Other Safe Sex Practices

Planned Parenthood’s website also includes cyber sex, phone sex and sharing fantasies as safe sex practices, which I really like because they, along with masturbation, expand the definition of what sex is. A lot of people define sex as penis-vagina intercourse. Others add anal intercourse to the short list and a smaller group of people count oral sex as sex too. Personally, I tend to define sex as any activity that gives sexual pleasure and could lead to an orgasm. So I think of masturbation as having sex with oneself and I think that partners can have sex without a penis involved or without penetration at all.

Safer Sex Practices

Kissing

The reason why kissing is in the “safer sex” category is because there are a few STIs that one can contract from kissing (see my STI 101 post for more information). Certain STIs can be transmitted by infected saliva and enter the body through cuts in the mouth/lips or bleeding gums (due to brushing one’s teeth or flossing).

Fondling

There is a chance (albeit small) when partners touch each other in a sexual manner, that STIs can be transmitted by someone’s bodily fluids coming in contact with cuts on an individual’s hand, allowing the STI to enter the body. Wearing latex gloves (or polyurethane gloves if someone has a latex allergy) is a simple way to reduce the risk of contracting an STI by creating a barrier.

Dry Humping

Depending on the amount of clothes the people in question are wearing, there may be an exchange of bodily fluids. If this is the case, the chances for STI transmission increase.

Oral Sex

For STIs like HIV, oral sex is a very low-risk form of safer sex (in comparison to vaginal and anal intercourse), but this is not the case with all STIs (see STI 101 post for more information). Condoms and dental dams create a barrier so that the chances of coming in contact with infected bodily fluids are reduced. Dental dams also reduce skin-to-skin contact. For those who do not know, dental dams are rectangular pieces of latex that can be placed upon the genitals and anus and used for oral sex. The Sheer Glyde dam is a brand of dental dam that has been approved for safer sex by the FDA. Admittedly, dental dams can be pretty hard to find since one cannot just pick them up from the average drugstore next to the condoms for some reason. However, dental dams can be purchased online and in sex toy shops (like Babeland) or picked up for free at clinics/health centers, like Planned Parenthood. If a dental dam is not present, non-microwaveable saran wrap/plastic wrap or a condom or glove that has been cut open in a rectangular shape can be used as a substitute.

Vaginal/Anal Intercourse with a Condom and Lubricant

Vaginal and anal intercourse are the two sexual activities with the highest risk of STI transmission. Using condoms and lube can substantially reduce this risk. As it does with oral sex, condoms form a barrier so that individuals can decrease their chances of coming in contact with infected bodily fluids. Also proper lubricant (water-based and silicone-based lubricants [see HIV 101 post for more information on lubricants]) will prevent tears from forming in the vaginal and anal canals so STIs cannot enter the body. It is important to note that condoms do not reduce the risk of all STI transmission altogether. There are STIs that are spread through skin-to-skin contact or by contact with open sores that may not be completely covered by a condom (or a dental dam for that matter). “Female” condoms (also known as insertive or “innie”condoms) cover more surface area than “male” condoms (“outie” condoms), reducing the likelihood of STI transmission due to skin-to-skin contact. They are just as effective as barriers against contact with potentially infected bodily fluids.

Life is all about taking risks. Educate yourself and make the right decisions, according to your needs and ideals.

For this information and more, check out the PlannedParenthood website 

Preview of the next post: Birth Control 101 and maybe a little politics.

STI 101

Recently, I have been having quite a few conversations with people about how various STIs are transmitted. Consequently, I have become interested in discordant partners, meaning partners who have different statuses (e.g. one is HIV positive and the other is not). Now, I am a believer in being risk-aware. Life is all about taking risks. If someone is aware of all the risks in a given situation and makes an educated decision as a result, I have nothing but respect for the person, regardless of the decision made. That all being said, this STI 101 post will place a bit more emphasis on how to avoid contracting and spreading an STI in a situation where partners have differing statuses.

The STIs I will discuss in this post are chlamydia, gonorrhea, hepatitis B, herpes, human papillomavirus (HPV) and syphilis. If you are looking for HIV, here is my HIV 101 post. For each STI, I will discuss what is it, how it is transmitted, symptoms, basic testing information, treatment and how to protect yourself and/or how to not spread it to your partners.

Note: Similar to my HIV 101 post, I will not cite my sources throughout my post. I will link my sources at the end.

Chlamydia

What is it?

Chlamydia is a sexually transmitted infection caused by the bacterium Chlamydia trachomatis.

Transmission

Chlamydia is mainly transmitted through vaginal and anal sex. It can also be transmitted from a pregnant mother to her child during birth. The child is most likely to be exposed to chlamydia if the mother contracts it during her pregnancy. Although rare, chlamydia can also be transmitted through oral sex and by touching your eye with your hand that has the bacteria on it. It is estimated that about 2.8 million new infections occur every year. Apparently, people under the age of 25 are the most susceptible to contracting chlamydia.

Symptoms

Most people who contract chlamydia will not experience symptoms. When someone does experience symptoms, they will usually appear about five to ten days after they contracted the STI. Some common symptoms are: abdominal pain, bleeding between periods, abnormal discharge coming from the genitals, painful urination, and genital and anal swelling. If chlamydia has infected the throat, the individual may experience a sore throat and if it has infected the eyes, the individual may experience eye redness, itching and fluid discharge.

If chlamydia is not treated for a long period of time, it can cause pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), which infects the fallopian tubes, ovaries and uterus, and epididymitis, which infects the urethra and testicles. Both of these diseases can lead to infertility.

Testing

A health care provider can determine whether or not someone has chlamydia by taking cell samples from the cervix (Pap Smear), penis, urethra or anus. Also urine can be tested. 

Since most people who have chlamydia will not experience symptoms, the only certain way to know if one has contracted chlamydia is to get tested regularly.

Treatment

Chlamydia is treated with antibiotics. If someone has contracted chlamydia, their sex partners should be tested and subsequently treated if they also have chlamydia. Individuals should not have sex (all forms of sex. Yes, oral counts.) until 7 days have passed if they took a single dose antibiotic or after they have finished taking their 7-day course of antibiotics. This is important because not having sex for 7 days will prevent the spread of the STI. Also the CDC (Center for Disease Control) recommends that people should be retested three months after they were treated just to be on the safe side.

Ok, so about sex…

Since chlamydia is mainly spread through unprotected sex, one should use condoms and dental dams to protect oneself from potential infection. I would also suggest using gloves while engaging in manual stimulation (i.e. fingering the vagina and/or anus) to avoid a situation in which a person could infect their eyes by touching it with a potentially contaminated hand.

Gonorrhea

What is it?

Gonorrhea is a sexually transmitted infection caused by the bacterium Neisseria gonorrhoeae. It is also known as “the clap” or “the drip”.

Transmission

 Gonorrhea is transmitted though oral, vaginal and anal sex. Gonorrhea can also be passed from a pregnant woman to her child during childbirth. It is estimated that over 700,000 people become infected with gonorrhea every year.

Symptoms

Like chlamydia, individuals with gonorrhea usually do not experience symptoms. If someone does experience symptoms, they tend to occur one to fourteen days after the initial infection. Some common symptoms include: abdominal pain, bleeding between periods, painful urination, abnormal pain, genital discharge, urinating more than usual, anal discharge and genital swelling. If the throat is infected, one can experience an itchy, sore throat or trouble swallowing.

If a child contracts gonorrhea through the pregnant mother, it can lead to premature birth, stillbirth and infections of the blood, joints and eyes.

If gonorrhea remains untreated it can also cause pelvic inflammatory disease and epididymitis.

Testing

To test for gonorrhea, a health care provider could collect samples of abnormal discharges, cell samples from the cervix, penis, urethra, anus or throat and urine.

Treatment

Gonorrhea can be treated with antibiotics. However, recently, drug-resistant strains are evolving around the world, making treating gonorrhea very difficult. The CDC recommends treating gonorrhea with dual therapy with the use of two drugs to treat the infection. Please make sure to take all the prescribed antibiotics to ensure the infection is gone. Not sticking with the antibiotic regimen for the entire period of time can create more drug-resistant strains.

Ok, so about sex…

Since gonorrhea is spread through unprotected sex, one should use condoms and dental dams to protect themselves.

Hepatitis B

What is it?

Hepatitis is an infection of the liver. 

Transmission

The type of hepatitis virus that is most likely to be sexually transmitted is hepatitis B (HBV). HBV is transmitted through vaginal fluids, semen (cum and precum), blood and urine. Infected fluids must come in contact with cuts and tears in the skin and/or through mucous membranes, like the ones in the vagina, anus and mouth. HBV can be spread through unprotected oral, vaginal and anal sex. The friction created in unprotected vaginal and anal sex can cause the canals to tear, giving the virus a way to enter the body. HBV can also be passed from pregnant woman to her child during birth.

HBV can also be spread by sharing intravenous drug needles or using contaminated needles in piercing or tattooing.

Symptoms

Individuals who contract HBV usually do not experience symptoms. When someone does experience symptoms, they usually appear between six weeks and six months after the initial infection. Some common symptoms include: extreme tiredness, abdominal pain/tenderness, loss of appetite, nausea, joint pain, headaches, fever, hives, dark urine, and jaundice.

Testing

A health care provider can conduct a blood test in order to diagnose someone with HBV.

Treatment

A cure for hepatitis does not exist. In most cases, hepatitis B goes away on it’s own in four to eight weeks. However, in some cases, people become carriers and suffer from chronic HBV infection. Carriers can be contagious for the rest of their lives. There are drugs that can help treat chronic HBV, but again, a cure does not exist.

The HBV vaccine is given to prevent an infection, not to cure an already existing one. The vaccine causes the immune system to create antibodies that will fight off the virus.

Ok, so about sex…

One can protect themselves by using condoms and dental dams while having vaginal, anal and oral sex.

Herpes

What is it?

Herpes is an STI caused by two viruses: herpes simplex virus type 1 (HSV-1) and herpes simplex virus type 2 (HSV-2). Both types can infect the oral and genital areas. However, oral herpes is mostly caused by HSV-1 and genital herpes is mostly caused by HSV-2.

Eight out of ten people in the US have oral herpes and one out of four have genital herpes.

Transmission

Herpes can be spread by touching, kissing and vaginal, anal and oral sex. A pregnant woman can pass herpes to her child during birth. Herpes is the most contagious while the individual has open sores. Cuts in the mouth, cuts in the skin and internal tears due to unprotected sex can make a person more susceptible to contracting herpes.

Symptoms

In many cases, someone with herpes may not experience symptoms for years. Or the symptoms can be so mild that they are not noticed or are not taken seriously.

With oral herpes, cold sores can appear on the lips/mouth and can last for a few weeks and then disappear. Symptoms can reappear weeks, months, or years later. Recurring outbreaks could be caused by: stress, menstruation, other infections, sunburn, sex and skin irritation.

With genital herpes, some symptoms include: clusters of sores on the vagina, cervix, vulva, penis or anus, itching and genital swelling. No one is sure what causes recurring outbreaks in genital herpes.

Initial herpes outbreak symptoms can also include: fever, headache, chills and flu-like symptoms.

Initial symptoms usually go away after two to four weeks and recurring symptoms usually go away after ten to fourteen days.

Testing

A health care provider can conduct a blood test to determine whether or not someone has contracted herpes.

Treatment

A cure for herpes does not exist. However, there are antiviral medications that can suppress recurrent outbreaks while the person takes the medication. Daily suppressive therapy for those who experience symptoms is available in order to reduce the likelihood of transmission to partners.

Ok, so about sex…

During an outbreak, an individual should refrain from having sex and/or kissing (oral herpes). However, it should be noted that even when symptoms are not present, a person could still potentially spread herpes with unprotected sex. Wait until seven days have passed and the outbreak has fully ended before having sex again.

Condoms and dental dams reduce the risk of transmission, but not completely. Contact with sores or fluids, not completely covered by condoms and dental dams, can transmit the virus.

If you are having sex with someone who has herpes, be sure to get tested regularly.

Human Papillomavirus 

What is it?

There are over one hundred types of human papillomavirus (HPV). Forty of those can infect the genital area. Genital HPV is very common. Many people have had HPV at one point and many do not know currently they have it.

Transmission

Genital HPV is transmitted through skin-to-skin contact during vaginal, anal and oral sex.

Symptoms

Most people who contract HPV do not experience symptoms. 

In many cases, the immune system clears up the virus on its own and the infection will disappear in eight to thirteen months.

However, in the cases, in which the body does not successfully fight off the virus completely, it can cause the body to change. These changes include genital warts and cancer. The strains of HPV that cause genital warts are considered low-risk. High-risk strains of genital herpes can cause cervical, vaginal, anal, penile and throat cancer.

Testing

A common way for someone to find out they have HPV is after receiving abnormal test results from a pap smear. During a pap smear, cell samples are taken from the cervix and tested for abnormalities. Other than a pap smear, there are no other tests for HPV.

Treatment

There is no cure for HPV itself. However, there are treatments for the genital warts and cancers that HPV causes. It is best to diagnose and treat a HPV-related cancer early while it is easily treatable.

There are two vaccines (Cervarix and Gardasil) that help to protect against the strains of HPV that are most responsible for causing cervical cancer. Gardasil also helps to protect against genital warts and other types of HPV-related cancers. Both vaccines are recommended by the CDC to young women between the ages of 11 and 26. Recently, the CDC has recommended that Gardasil should be made available to young men between the ages of 11 and 21. Gardasil is licensed for young men between the ages of 9 and 26.

Ok, so about sex…

Use condoms and dental dams to lower the chances of HPV infection. Barriers (condoms and dental dams) do not completely protect against HPV, but they are much safer than unprotected sex.

Syphilis

What is it?

Syphilis is an STI caused by the bacterium Treponema pallidum. 

Transmission

Syphilis is transmitted by contact with open syphilis sores. Contact can happen during vaginal, anal and oral sex. Rarely, syphilis can be spread through kissing if there are sores on the person’s mouth. It can infect the vagina, anus, urethra, penis, lips and mouth. About 36,000 people in the US contract syphilis each year.

Symptoms

Most of the time, a person who has contracted syphilis will either not experience symptoms or the symptoms will be so mild that the person would not really pay attention to them.

There are three stages of syphilis infection:

• Primary Stage – In this stage, painless open sores (known as chancres) appear on the genitals, in the vagina, on the cervix, lips, mouth, breasts, or anus. The sores usually appear about three weeks after infection, but may take up to 90 days. Without treatment, they last 3–6 weeks. Syphilis is especially contagious when sores are present. The liquid that oozes from them is very infectious.

• Secondary Stage – After three to six weeks, other symptoms may appear. These symptoms can disappear and reappear repeatedly for up to two years. These symptoms include: body rashes, mild fever, fatigue, sore throat, hair and weight loss, swollen glands, headache, and muscle pains.

• Late Stage – Long-term untreated syphilis can cause serious damage to the nervous system, heart, brain and other organs and even death.

Syphilis is not usually contagious during the latent stages (hiding period) in the first four years. Untreated syphilis can remain latent for many years or a lifetime. It can still be transmitted from a pregnant woman to her child.

Testing

Like many other STIs, a person who has syphilis will not usually experience symptoms. Regular STI testing will ensure that a syphilis infection is caught early and treated.

Treatment

Syphilis is treated with antibiotics and, in the early stages, syphilis is very easy to treat. Although syphilis is easy to treat, the effects of long-term untreated syphilis are not. A health care provider will test blood or fluid from sores to diagnose someone with syphilis.

Ok, so about sex…

Using condoms and dental dams will reduce the risk of contracting/spreading syphilis.

If there is anything you would like to see added or removed from this post, please let me know (along with the reasons for your request, of course).

CDC and HPV vaccine 

CDC STI main page

Planned Parenthood STI main page 

The Medicalization of Childbirth

Yeah, I know, I’m talking about medicalization again. Seriously though, it’s a process that influences so many aspects of our society and I dislike it so much! That all being said, I promise this is my last medicalization post for a little while so bear with me.

So what do I mean by “the medicalization of childbirth”? I would define it as the process in which the phenomenon of childbirth is seen as something that requires medical interventions in order to be successful. The female body alone is not seen as sufficient and, without these medical interventions, not only would the birthing process be unsuccessful, it would also be dangerous. This medicalization process did not happen overnight. According to Kristi Williams and Debra Umberson in their article, “Medical Technology and Childbirth: Experiences of Expectant Mothers and Fathers,” before the nineteenth century, “childbirth was treated largely as a natural process requiring little or no medical intervention. In the mid- to late-1800s, however, a number of social and cultural factors converged to open the door for medical involvement in the birth process…A central component of this effort was the medicalization of pregnancy and childbirth and the elimination of the competition of midwives” (149). The medicalization of childbirth was born out of competition and a need to make money. The Industrial Revolution also began at around this time and its themes seeped from the factory floor into the birthing room. The body, namely the female body, came to be seen as a machine that can break down and the doctor came to be seen as the mechanic. The doctor becomes the only person who can fix the flaws inherent in the female body. As a result, “the woman becomes the recipient rather than the producer of the child” (149-150). She loses her reproductive power as she is reduced to a potentially dangerous vessel from which the doctor must procure the child.

These themes are still present today. How many times have you heard a woman mention receiving and/or desperately needing epidurals or other forms of pain medication the moment someone brings up the topic of childbirth? And in this country, most births take place in a hospital under the guidance of doctors and nurses. But hospitals are places for the sick. Why should a perfectly healthy pregnant woman automatically be expected to have her baby in a hospital? Because women are made to be afraid. Women are scared of a process that they (and other mammals) have been doing for ages. As Kiki Zeldes and Judy Norsigian declare in their article, “Encouraging Women to Consider a Less Medicalized Approach to Childbirth Without Turning Them Off: Challenges to Producing Our Bodies, Ourselves: Pregnancy and Birth,” “Highly medicalized birth is now the norm for most women, and the perception is that they should fear birth—or at least worry about it incessantly. Many women believe labor and birth will involve insurmountable pain and suffering that can be controlled only with an epidural, and that a medicalized, high-tech birth is the best and safest option for them and their babies” (246). When you hear women talk about giving birth, all they can talk about is how painful and horrible it will be/was and how they will demand medication the moment they set foot in the hospital. You really can’t blame women too much when all their information about childbirth is gained from the medical system and the media. Have you ever seen a TV show or a movie that did not depict childbirth as a horrible apocalyptic event? I haven’t. Women are being primed from the start to have certain beliefs about childbirth. It seems as if giving birth is this horrible life or death situation that one can barely survive, which is interesting when one realizes that women and animals have been able to continue their species for all this time. How were women in the past able to bear it if it was so terrible? And don’t animals feel this pain too? If giving birth was so terrible, why haven’t mammals evolved to make this process completely painless? You would think (if we are analyzing this from an evolutionary standpoint) that since this horrible process could potentially affect the reproductive success of numerous species, a mechanism would have evolved to ease this process. But it hasn’t. Animals are usually able to bear it just fine. What makes humans so different? Are we weaker than animals?

Apparently, we are if all these medical interventions are anything to go by. The medical interventions I will be discussing in this post are elective inductions and caesarian sections (aka c-sections). 

• Inductions are measures taken to speed up the birth of a child. Inductions are appropriate if the continuation of the labor would negatively affect the health of the mother or the child. Inductions become ‘elective inductions’ when the labor is sped up for reasons other than the health of the mother or child. In a labor without complications and a healthy mother, there is no need whatsoever for inductions. And inductions in low-risk pregnancies come with risks. In the article, “Elective Induction of Labor as a Risk Factor for Cesarean Delivery Among Low-Risk Women at Term,” Arthur S. Maslow and Amy L. Sweeny discuss some of the risks and costs of having an induced vaginal birth. They reveal that inducing labor in an otherwise healthy pregnancy “significantly increased the risk of cesarean delivery for nulliparas [women who have never given birth before], and increased hospital predelivery time and costs” (917). Complications that arise from interventions can result in more interventions, which could result in more complications. This cascade effect could then put the mother and/or child at risk, necessitating an emergency c-section that was previously unneeded. Maslow et al. brings up another point: Not only are electively induced vaginal births correlated with an increased risk for an unplanned c-section, they also cost more money than a non-induced birth. Maslow et al. calculated the cost to be an “additional $273 per elective induction” (921). With an additional predelivery time of four hours (an extra four hours before the baby is actually born), the actual induction procedure and an increased chance of epidural use (probably due to the extra four hours of labor), it is not hard to see why an induced birth would cost more money (917, 921).
• Cesarean sections, also known as c-sections, are becoming a disturbing trend in childbirth in this country. Silver et al. discloses this alarming fact in their article,  “Maternal Morbidity Associated With Multiple Repeat Cesarean Deliveries:” In 2006, the c-section rate in the US reached over 29%. Much higher than the World Health Organization’s maximum recommended rate of 15% (1231). Although the Maternity Center Association in New York has declared that vaginal births are safer than c-sections, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists “has determined that it is ethically permissible to accede to a request for an elective cesarean section from an informed woman (Klein 161). However, are women being properly informed? They are already being primed to believe that non-induced vaginal births are one of the most dangerous and/or painful events they can possibly experience. On top of that, many doctors in this country tend to tout c-sections as a much safer and much more convenient alternative. But is that really the case? Zeldes et al. do not think so. They disagree saying, “Most women are not aware that the pain of a cesarean birth may extend well beyond the postpartum period. A recent Birth article on postpartum problems showed that 18 percent of women who had a cesarean section reported pain at the site of the incision 6 months after surgery” (247). A cesarean section is a surgery with all of the risks and complications that come with it. The hospital stay is extended in order for the mother to recover from the surgery and Silver et al, lists other risks and complications that one has to think about before undergoing a c-section: “Serious maternal morbidity [illness] increases with increasing number of cesarean deliveries. The majority of this risk is attributable to that associated with placenta accreta [when the placenta attaches too deeply to the uterus] and/or the need for hysterectomy [removal of the uterus]. Placenta postoperative ventilation, intensive care unit admission, operative time, and days of hospitalization, also was increased with increasing number of cesarean deliveries”(1229-1230). All of these risks are not considered when perfectly healthy women decide to go under the knife.

 So as a result of a lack of knowledge and fear of pain, women allow these unnecessary medical interventions to occur, putting themselves at potential physical risk. However, a woman’s physical health is not the only thing that suffers. Williams et al. declare, “research on women’ s pregnancy and childbirth experiences suggests that the use of medical technology alienates many women by minimizing the importance of their roles and their level of control over their bodies and birth experiences” (147). Apparently, medical interventions have a tendency to decrease a woman’s birthing self-efficacy, meaning they negatively affect a woman’s belief that she is strong enough to give birth on her own.  N.K. Lowe further examines the birthing self-efficacy of pregnant women in their article, “Self-efficacy for labor and childbirth fears in nulliparous pregnant women”. Lowe states, “If a woman does not believe that she is capable of the tasks or effort required to cope with labor, she is unlikely to be motivated even to try. Avoidance of, or withdrawal from, the experience through anesthesial analgesia or even Cesarean section becomes an attractive alternative. Likewise, her thoughts about labor, including her affective state, are influenced so that labor becomes an insurmountable task generating great anxiety and fear” (223). Women are then encouraged to give up their control to medical “experts” and to medical interventions that are unneeded and potentially dangerous.

There is another school of thought, unrelated to fear and the “dangers” of vaginal birth, that support full elective medical interventions during childbirth: convenience. William F. Rayburn and Jun Zhang discuss the appeal of convenience in their article, “Rising Rates of Labor Induction: Present Concerns and Future Strategies”. They admit: “Scheduling an induction rather than waiting for spontaneous labor offers many advantages: easing domestic arrangements, ensuring attendance of the patient’s physician, and avoiding journeys during labor either from distant places or in severe climatic conditions” (166). Planning the birth of one’s child the same way one would plan a business meeting does seem appealing. And many women see it as exercising their right to choose and the ability to medically control the frightening birthing process. Being able to plan one’s labor also sounds like a dream to doctors. They could schedule deliveries to the days and times that are the most convenient for them. Also, according to Klein, elective c-sections and other medical interventions are supported by many in the medical community because the interventions make the birthing process something they can totally control (163). This is true for c-sections, especially. Instead of relying on the workings of a woman’s body and giving it the time and/or space needed for it to do what it has evolved to do, doctors can just perform the surgery, deliver the baby and move on with their day.

Despite the conveniences, as stated previously, there are a lot of health risks associated with elective c-sections and inductions that women are not being made aware of. Klein bemoans the fact that “women rarely receive the time (which should be at least an hour) that a full discussion of the complexities of birth alternatives deserves. Moreover, the person providing the counseling is often in a conflict of interest” (162-163). Women are not being properly informed of all the possible risks of medical interventions in part because these interventions tend to be more convenient for the doctor. The issue of choice and consent in regards to elective medical interventions is a gray one because how can someone make an informed decision without accurate information? Women are made to believe that vaginal births are terrifying and that c-sections, epidurals and inductions are the safest ways to give birth when that is not necessarily the case. Instead women should be made aware of the power and magnificence of their bodies. They should be aware that it is possible to give birth without heaps of medication and they do not need medical interventions in low-risk pregnancies. If after receiving accurate and detailed information, a woman still wants some medical intervention than that is her decision, but without being properly informed, it seems as if women are being trapped into believing that their bodies are once again not good enough.

Monogamy as Mandatory?

Our society is enraptured by monogamy. So much so that other forms of intimate relationships never cross the minds of most people. It’s talked about in nearly every movie and nearly every song: finding one’s soul mate, getting married and being extremely jealous because another individual is stepping on their romantic territory. Even the scientific community is participating in this love affair with monogamy. Animals and genes are being observed and analyzed to discover the roots of the one and only true way to be in a relationship. Now, as you should know by now from reading my other blog posts, I am not a fan of being told I only have one option. Life is never that simple and when someone tries to claim that life is that simple, something is very wrong. So what is monogamy? Why does society love it so much? And are there other options?

Monogamy is a type of relationship in which two individuals decide to have sex/be intimate only with one another. One recurring idea that I have come across in life and while researching for this post is the idea that monogamy is pure and natural. When I typed in the word “monogamy” or the phrase “monogamy in humans” in Google Scholar I was pretty shocked by all of these articles enthusiastically supporting the naturalness of monogamy. I could not help but wonder why was it so important to find examples of monogamy in the animal kingdom? Would discovering that monogamy exists in animals and even in animals closely related to humans really prove that monogamy is the only natural way? First of all, I have never understood the argument that something that is natural is automatically good. Obviously, that is not the case. Poison, diseases and hurricanes are natural, but they certainly are not things that people tend to want more of. Secondly, there are also many instances of non-monogamy in the animal kingdom. In their article, “The Benefit and the Doubt: Why Monogamy?,” G. A. Schuiling states, “The fact that humans can be monogamic is exceptional for an Ape: of the Apes, only the gibbons are [solely] monogamic” (56). They go on to say, “Chimpanzees live in relatively large, promiscuous groups (although there is a strict hierarchy with an ‘alpha male’ at the top, who mates with the majority of females). Male gorillas, on the other hand, have a harem of several females, while orangutans are polygamic” (56-57). Schuiling argues from an evolutionary theory perspective which I tend to dislike in discussions of sexuality, but I do find it amusing that nature readily challenges the “naturalness” of monogamy.

That being said, I should explain why I tend to dislike evolutionary theory in discussions of sexuality. In evolutionary theory (and in everyday life) monogamy automatically refers to a heteronormative couple. Also monogamy is described as the pinnacle of evolution and as absolutely necessary because how else will females obtain resources in order to care for their offspring without a male present? In evolutionary theory, males are on the hunt for young fertile females to impregnate so their genes will be passed to future generations and females are on the hunt for a big, strong male who has lots of resources and who seems healthy enough to provide them with offspring (Schuiling 57). Well what about individuals who are not straight? What does evolutionary theory have to say about them? Pretty much nothing. People who are not heteronormative are seen as failures evolutionarily speaking because they will not procreate and spread their genes (which is obviously the only thing we live for), but at least, they can help care for the children of their heteronormative relatives in order to be evolutionarily useful according to the kin selection theory (this theory, by the way, is incorrect). Now, one could argue that these evolutionary theories only reference the past and obviously have no bearing in our modern world. I would disagree. These theories still influence the ideas and beliefs held by our society today. When society proclaims the naturalness of monogamy, they are also proclaiming the naturalness of heterosexuality and ‘traditional’ gender roles. This is evident in how ridiculously difficult it is for non-heterosexual people to gain equal marriage rights in this country. It is evident in the idea that in order for homosexuality to be seen as acceptable, a gene has to be discovered or examples in nature have to be found in order to prove its “naturalness” and by proxy, its goodness. It is evident in the idea that virginity (and the virginity of women, in particular) is still prized in this society. What better way to control women and their sexuality than to demonize them if they do not keep themselves ‘pure’ so they can be worthy of their future husbands who will provide them with resources? And it is evident in the idea that young (barely legal) women are the sexual ideal in this society. Obviously, one has to make sure they are fertile enough to spread a man’s genetic material.

If monogamy is the only true and natural way, then why is divorce so common and necessary? Shouldn’t it be extremely easy to stay with the first person one falls in love with for the rest of their life? But it isn’t. People break up, divorce and cheat on their partners every day. Monogamy also has this connotation of being the more moral option because no one wants to be “promiscuous”. That is just not what good people do. Christian Klesse in their article, “Polyamory and its ‘Others’: Contesting the Terms of Non-Monogamy,” states, “The derogatory term ‘promiscuity’ implies that a person has ‘unreasonable’ numbers of sexual partners. It is frequently associated with immaturity, character-deficiency, shallowness, narcissism, egocentrism, relational incapacity, lack of responsibility, and worthlessness” (573). This reminds me of a theme I constantly bring up: Normal vs. Abnormal. When I see a phenomenon described as abnormal or “unreasonable,” I cannot help but take a critical look at the argument being made. What exactly is an unreasonable amount of partners? Is it any partners other than the person one intends on marrying (if that’s even an option)? And is everyone capable of being promiscuous? I would postulate that only women have that dubious honor. I rarely hear teenage boys being told to be careful not to become “one of those boys”. So if having an “unreasonable” amount of partners makes a person an immature and worthless individual with a character deficiency, it is no wonder why many people do not even consider anything beyond monogamy (and lie about how many partners they’ve had). Interestingly enough, Schuiling comes to the same conclusion I do, using evolutionary theory in all of its essentialism. They conclude, “Culture, with its temptations but also with its system of bans and commandments, may strongly frustrate urges deeply rooted in the human mind” (Schuiling 59). Schuiling believes that although men and women desperately want to find that one perfect mate, they also want to mate with as many people as possible in order to ensure genetic security and survival. Schuiling thinks that cultural institutions, like religion and marriage, evolved to control these other urges as much as possible. As a result, according to Schuiling, compulsory monogamy is not natural for humans and flies in the face of other urges, which has the potential for conflict.

Now that I have discussed the ‘natural origins’ of monogamy, I want to discuss social influences and pressures. One idea that seems to be very powerful in this society is the idea of the “soul mate”. A soul mate is said to be the one and only person out there for everyone. No one else in this entire world will ever be better suited. This soul mate will have everything a person ever needed and will be everything they could possibly ever want. All someone has to do is find them. And if a person is in a relationship with someone who doesn’t have everything they want, the person either must deal with it and accept that they will not be completely fulfilled in this relationship or leave and find someone else because clearly that original person wasn’t their soul mate. This could lead to serial monogamy and eventual frustration because that one person who solves all of their romantic problems seems so elusive. Can one person really fulfill all of a person’s needs? Should there only be one person in one’s life to fulfill all of their needs? Society does not have this expectation for friendships. No one is forced to have only one best friend who MUST be able to handle all of their friendship needs. If there is enough room in one’s heart to love all of our friends and family in various ways and capacities, then why can’t there be enough room for multiple romantic/sexual/intimate relationships?

This brings the discussion to the topic of polyamory and other types of non-monogamy. There are many different types of non-monogamy, but three common types are: Swinging (being in a relationship with one person, but being able to have sex with others with the consent of the partner), casual sex (sex with multiple people without building committed relationships), and polyamory (building various types of relationships with multiple people). I should state that all 3 forms of non-monogamy are valid and none of them are better than others. For the purpose of this post, I will talk a bit more about polyamory. Jin Haritaworn, Chin-ju Lin and Christian Klesse, in their article, “Poly/logue: A Critical Introduction to Polyamory,” assert that polyamory “tries to provide languages and ethical guidelines for alternative lifestyles and sexual and intimate relationships beyond the culture of ‘compulsory monogamy’ (518).” In essence, it is about options and providing people with other ways to love or relate with others if monogamy does not make them happy. Two common reactions that I receive when I bring up the topic of polyamory with someone new are “Oh no, I would get too jealous” and “Isn’t that just cheating?” The role of jealousy in a relationship is very fascinating to me. It almost seems as if jealousy is a required part of a monogamous relationship. Jealousy is a horrible emotion. It is based out of insecurity (regarding one’s self and the relationship) and the idea that another person might pose a threat to the relationship. I am sure most people would agree that it is not a pleasant experience, but for some reason, it is still seen as something that just happens, just another aspect of being in a relationship. But honestly it does not have to be this way in any relationship, monogamous or non-monogamous. A successful relationship, whether it is monogamous or non-monogamous, requires communication and honesty. Without these things, relationships are doomed to fail. Being honest to partners about one’s feelings and encouraging open discussion about them will assuage negative feelings. Jealousy is a powerful emotion, but that does not mean people should let it get the best of them. Acknowledging one’s own jealousy and then discussing it with your partner(s) is a healthier and more positive way of dealing with it without damaging the relationship in question. And as for cheating: No, being poly is not synonymous with cheating. Cheating involves hiding/lying to your partner(s). As long as you are honest with your partners and communicate with them clearly about your needs and desires then no, it is not cheating. And being poly, just like any other form of relationship, requires honesty and communication to make it work.

As I said before, for me, it is all about giving people the ability to choose what is best for them. Polyamory is not for everyone just like monogamy isn’t for everyone. People deserve options and shouldn’t be forced into one type of relationship. One type of relationship is not more “natural” or better than another. Monogamy is not mandatory and no one should feel ashamed for living a life that fulfills them.